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A Conference AFTER the Conference
Episode #561
September 3, 2017
With Martha Kilpatrick and hosted by John Enslow
Special Guest: Lori Thomas, Gaby Schubert, Fabiola Fernandez, Carole Nelson
This is the continuation of a series of Podcasts started in Episode #560.
After The Road That Leads to Life conference, we gathered with some dear friends to share gems of revelation that were unique and wonderfully new!
(Lori) This is just something that I had written down for the conference as well as for the last taping. “The simplicity and purity of the gospel of Christ coming from the simplicity and purity of devotion to Christ.” No, that’s just something that I, well, I heard that a couple of times.
(Martha) Would you say it again?
(Lori) “The simplicity and purity of the gospel of Christ coming from the simplicity and purity of devotion to Christ.”(Martha) Umhmmm.
(Lori) It’s not mine. It’s not. And it was like everything from Him and everything toward Him, and it was a wonder. And it was, it was like the river. And I mean, big, wide, gorgeous, amazing river. Something else I wrote down, “The old has passed away, the new has come.” That’s specifically the Old Testament to the New Testament. And in that too, what you were saying earlier it seemed like, and Carole mentioned as well: “The freedom from the law of performance to the performance of God, of Christ in us.” That’s it.
(Gaby) This freedom of performance of Christ in us means, what we see in Martha, this willingness to complete weakness. And it is possibly the most courage it takes in life to simply be nothing and have nothing as you used to say. And I found out these last days how little I am there, much less than I thought to be. And it has to do with that readiness to go with Christ all the way of His cross. And we used to pick up or let’s say, I used to pick out much of what His life is like. And of course we would love His authority, His freedom, His peace—I don’t like His cross that much. And still if we join in His life all the way long, it would lead us up to that Gethsemane garden, and then later even down through that valley up there to this mountain with the cross. And it would take all our life away. It would mean complete death, and my flesh does not like to go there. It’s really, it is simple, but not easy. It takes a decision to say yes to wherever He goes, and that, I think that’s what’s meant when Revelation says “Those who follow the Lamb wherever He goes.” It’s this way up to the cross, wherever. And still to the end and you won’t run away like the disciples – what I still do. But stand there not… Finally not even stand there at Jesus’ feet, but get up with Him. And so, I really need His grace to do that in me. Even that I can’t do, I cannot. Even that, that even less I can do than anything else. It has to be Him to reveal it, to do it, to make it. And on the other hand when we pray, “Your will be done on earth as it is in heaven,” it’s the same prayer, which would say, “Your Kingdom come.” So, if we want His Kingdom to come, it’s His will to be done as in heaven. And this is 100%. I’m at the, much of His will is done in my life, but… And this is not the Kingdom in the earth. So, we have to come to the point where we say with Christ, “It’s my food to do Your will.” I pondered lots in my morning prayer today about this. It’s my food. It’s what sustains Him. He lives on doing His will. As He says that man doesn’t live from bread alone but from the word coming out of God’s mouth. So, His will is this living. The Word is not scripture, it’s not the written Word, it’s the Word alive coming right now. And we have to receive it right now. And have to listen to it and have to obey it right now, this very second. I’m far away from that, but that’s what He revealed to me. And if you get used to obey it right now, we might even get hopefully able to get this way up to Golgotha one day.
(Fabiola) Coming from a time, not that I enjoyed very much, but of feeling His love persecuting me and reducing me. The whole conference and today in the morning I feel hope. Even I can’t understand it all, but I feel hope. And Martha said in the conference that the Lord Jesus exalted Maria for his (her) act of love for Him. And it was not very much that she loved Him, but that she responded to His love. So, it matches my prayer, my words became to nothing in prayer. So, I began to pray what I feel it’s in the Word. And then I find that since God so loved the world – and in Spanish, this ‘so’ little, tiny word means indescribable ways. Well, it’s such a way. God loves us in such a way that He gave His only begotten Son. So, this is how I’ve been praying for me, and I wanted to leave this as a prayer for us.
I pray that we may be able to receive after emptying of ourselves, to receive His Son, which is His love in such a way that we might be able, enabled to live so loved that we might have the Son to give to the world, so loved by Him. Amen.
(Martha) That was beautiful, Fabiola, a beautiful prayer. We’ll print that up and make it ours. Oh, one of the favorite things I read recently was by Watchman Nee. And he said, “I offer myself to just be as one who is loved by You.” And I think Gaby wrote this beautiful post sometime back on a blog. And it was… I don’t remember the title of it (The Gaze of an Eye), Gaby, but it was He gazes at us, and that just transformed me. Do you have any memory of what you said in that? Ok. I tend to focus on I want to love Him. But the solution is to have Him gazing at you and loving you. And that’s different.
(Lori) And simple. I don’t have to, well, I think if I remember you, you did the series (Christ, My All) and the topic about being the moon and just to reflect His love, not me trying to figure out what it is that I can make Him love me. Now that’s simple.
(Carole) It is simple. It’s true, it’s simple. But we are full of barriers and strongholds that keep it from being simple. And Sunday, Martha, the teaching at the conference was for me extraordinarily transforming. And I couldn’t tell you right now exactly what she said, but I can tell you my response, or try to tell you my response to it. At the conference there was such an anointing of impartation, wouldn’t you say? It was just an amazing impartation. And while she was talking, you know, it’s so easy to say, “Jesus loves me, this I know, for the Bible tells me so… and when I’m good He loves me, and when I’m bad, He loves me.” But it’s another thing to really grasp that – not even grasp – to just let that be the truth, let that be the reality. And somehow when she was talking, He was talking. And He was somehow breaking down barriers that prevent that love that is like a river just come. And I think for the first time – I know it was the first time I’ve ever seen it just the way, and receive it just the way I did – He was my daddy and I was His little girl. And there was nothing – for a moment – there was nothing between us. And it’s like when you have that, there really isn’t any problem. And the performance is gone, and the trying disappears because He loves me. And He loves us, and He delights in us, and somehow in those moments my trying dissipated or was… I don’t know what it was. It was bombarded out of there. But gently, it was just gone. And I think that’s… How do we love Him until we really experience and know His love for us? It’s really, you know, it says that in the Word, but it’s a long way from what it says in the Word to becoming a reality and an experience and a life. How much time, Lord? How much time? Only He knows how much time. When He speaks that Word and we begin to receive it, how much time, Lord? It doesn’t become a command that we can set out and perform. Oh, I do that, I’ve done that. All of my life I’ve done that. I’ve thought He wanted me to do that. And when you’re under that kind of… It’s worse than a law, when you’re in that prison of your own making, then those bars are keeping the very love of God from coming in a capturing and captivating you. So, it was just, it was just, the conference was an amazing outpouring and impartation of His love, and an illustration of His purpose. And that was illustrated through Martha, which is, “Christ in me, the hope of glory.” It was a demonstration.
A Conference AFTER the Conference – Episode #561 – Shulamite Podcast
After The Road That Leads to Life conference, we gathered with some dear friends to follow the Lord further down the way. The Holy Spirit delivers His message so personally to each of us that each gem of revelation is always unique and wonderfully new!
So rich – from each of you! The theme of “performance” really struck me and I was left pondering about the good Samaritan (I don’t know why). And as I did, saw myself having fallen among robbers (Satan), beaten and left for dead and Christ being the Good Samaritan, Who had compassion, bandaged my wounds, pouring on oil and wine, giving me safe accommodations where He took care of me then paid, in advance, for everything I might need, even offering to repay the host of the inn more, if need be. (I’m not sure if that’s what this parable means – it’s just how I remembered it, from Martha or someone else.)
Interesting how this was introduced by the first commandment to “love the Lord your God with all your heart,” etc.
How else can we “go and do likewise” unless we first receive His love for us?
It seems that each of you mentioned “simple,” and I believe that; the “seeing” and especially the “receiving” are quite another thing. Those barriers, that were mentioned, are quite real but I’m touched by what Carole said (paraphrasing), that when you know Father as Abba, then those are gone; the trying is gone, because: He loves me!
And isn’t it true that once we’ve “seen” Love, everything changes?!
The responses to the conference message were uniquely inspiring and appreciated, as I wasn’t able to be there.
Blessings to all!