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Disapproval in Relationship
Walk and talk with John Enslow
If you no longer can hear God in relationship over the voice of man’s disapproval, it’s a dangerous position.
Hey there, so I’m on the top Neels Gap today and it’s absolutely beautiful. This is a perfect beginning of a fall day and I’m absolutely loving it. The weather is nice and cool. The color is starting to just barely come out. Some of the maple trees are turning and it’s just beautiful. I’m loving it!
I wanted to come today and I just want to do a quick video about some things that I am seeing that are pretty amazing. So out of some situations I’m seeing some really, really cool things. One, because of some earlier enmeshment I’ve had, I have realized that I have given a blank check to man to basically write out a check, a debt, that says that I’ve been rejected by God. I know that is just foolishness but I haven’t realize this before.
What I’m realizing is that if any man’s opinion of you holds the weight of your belief in God‘s opinion and view of you, then you’ve given somebody a place that’s just illegitimate. And I have had to repent of that illegitimacy that I literally allowed people to influence and manipulate and control me because if I garnered their rejection or disapproval, then I associated that with God Himself.
For my life it’s been particularly women that have carried that weight. And then when I was disapproved of, by women. When I was rejected by women, when they voiced or didn’t voice their disapproval of me, my life, who I am…anything like that, all of a sudden I felt that that was God. I felt that they were one and the same and synonymous.
I’ve had to repent for that. No man should be able to carry a blank check of our concept of God’s approval or disapproval. God can speak for Himself, and He has the power to do that. He has the willingness to do that and He has the jealousy over our hearts to do that.
I’m really excited that my God won’t leave me in such a quandary, because there is no dealing with it. If somebody disapproves of you, right or wrong, you associate with God’s disapproval of you, it’s a screwed up and disjointed transaction. God can speak for Himself.
He has always spoken to me, and He has spoken very clearly. Not that you can’t be corrected by a brother or sister, that’s not what this is about. This is about the fact that, first and foremost my relationship with God is with God. And if somebody comes to me with disapproval or even rejection, I can go to my Father and say, “Dad can you tell me about this, can You open my heart and tell me have I done something wrong? Do You have something to say?” And then you’re using an open dialogue with Him to really say, “I really want further connection with You in this.”
Like I said I had to repent of elevating the opinions of man over thoughts of God, the mind of God, the ways of God. And that is always, always, always a dangerous position because as humans, we are rather failing and frail and our emotions can be up one day down another. If we’re basing our self-worth, and our worth to God based on those elements we are really, really, really short changing ourselves and Him. He needs to be able to speak for Himself.
I’m really excited. I really am blessed that the Lord has pointed this out. It’s an old, old, old wound that is there and I am really facing it. I’m facing the old wound and I’m saying, “OK, I had idolatry. I had idolatry of that person’s opinions, that person’s thoughts of me, and I adhered it to God. Even if I didn’t know Him at the time. I adhered those thoughts to God. They were my god. That’s exactly how it went.
I don’t ever wanna do that again. I want God to speak for God and if I have a relationship with a person and they get angry with me, or I have to go through conflict with them. At least I’m clean, their relationship and me, my relationship and Him. I’m going to bring their relationship with me to Him and I’m gonna bring our relationship, mine and God’s, to our relationship. But as long as there’s a bypass, so to speak, it’s a blank check written in His voice. Their voice adhered to their His voice, I’m never going to win. That is never going to be a winning scenario.
I don’t know if this helps you out today. This is just some of the things that I’m seeing and some of the things I’m processing and I just wanted to bring you in and see if maybe this resonates with you. If there’s anything that you realize that somebody has a little stronger seal of approval in your heart, that you’ve given them the signet ring so to speak and the robe of God’s own voice, so that you no longer can hear God and that’s who you’re hearing. It’s a dangerous position but it’s easily resolved. It’s repentance and then it’s just walking away. So God bless you, I love you and I hope this helped.
Disapproval in Relationship – Episode #831 – Shulamite Podcast
If man’s disapproval holds the weight of your belief in God’s opinion of you, then you’ve given somebody a place that’s just illegitimate.
Wouldn’t it have been helpful if Adam had taken that piece of fruit to Dad and asked His opinion before he took a bite?
I was once in a group where many in the group looked up to a set a people in not a good way. So even though the people were not our idols, we felt the pressure and persuasion from the group that tried to out vocalize God’s voice. So this type thing can come in many flavors and varieties. Glad to be free.
How important it is to find the one thread of His voice & stay with Him in it. To add things that may touch it, is to invite the illegitimacy of idolatry…& lose the ability to hear Him. A wound of rejection chisels out an idol. I’m excited too, John! The Lord has uncovered what can hold hostage His children…where God is is seen to be less than He is! He has taken away layers on the outside, to still my heart…those speakings I ‘adhered to God’…to open my heart hear His voice. Really, so “my relationship with God is with God”. Yes! We can ask our Abba. He is eager to answer. He faithfully leads-speaks. He is well able to speak to me, & to those around me! Repentance pulls down the illegitimate idol. A brave heart (grace!) let’s everything stand aside to the moving of His Spirit, in our heart that is HIS. These videos are gift…to see you & hear the nuance of your voice brings such heart into it. Thank you! Wonderful helpful insight!