Glory of Guilt Free Life
March 15, 2015
With Martha Kilpatrick and hosted by John Enslow
Special Guest: Carole Nelson
(M) Well, good morning folks. I called this emergency meeting of the podcast group, Jennifer, Carole, John and me, because yesterday I got an epiphany, and as I shared it, we all got so excited, and we felt like it was really huge; something that we all need to know. So, Carole, tell us how cold it is up here in the mountains this morning.
(Carole) Well, it went down to 2 that I know of. It’s up to 9 right now.
(M) Really warm. Yesterday I was writing something about an experience of the glory I had maybe 35 years ago, and it will be published way down the road, but in it I began to see something. And I’ve been doing the devotional on the veil and beholding the glory and the transformation, transfiguration that comes from the glory. So I’ve been privately on the glory and reminiscing about some experiences. And I have to tell this so you’ll understand. I’ve told it before but it’s been a long time. I began my walk all alone. I didn’t have another believer. I was in church, very faithfully, but I knew the minister didn’t God at all, and he preached a social gospel only. He never talked about Jesus or the Bible. So I was very safe there; I mean from unbelief. He wasn’t even close to the truth and to the Bible. But I was alone, and I didn’t know there were books out there except Catherine Marshall in the library. And so I just, I just believed everything I read in the Bible. For me it was just absolutely truth. Of course it was. So I came to the Lord… That story is told; through repentance. I loved repentance, and I lived a life really of a lot of repentance, not forced and not made up, but the Holy Spirit was faithful to keep me in repentance. And I came to a, I took a passage in 1st John as my promise, and it’s 1:7; the first one is. “If we walk in the light as He is in the light we have fellowship with one another and the blood of Jesus Christ, His Son, cleanses us from all sin.” Verse 9 was where, what I clung to. “If we confess our sins He is faithful and just to forgive our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. And one day I noticed that it said He would forgive and cleanse, and it was not from a few things, but from all unrighteousness. And I just believed it. And I realized when I was writing yesterday, because the story of my experience of the glory was when He took me to a women’s retreat in another state, and I experienced the presence of God in a most astounding way. When I came home there was a friend I had at the time who had studied the glory all through the scriptures. And she was always talking about the glory and always begging God to experience the glory. And I would just listen to her because I never, I saw the word glory, but to me it was something you couldn’t know maybe til heaven. I didn’t focus on it. It was a mystery to me. But she took it and she saw from scripture that we are to experience the glory. So she was always… and would just listen, because she was the expert on the glory. So when I came back from that retreat, I told her about the experience. She said, “Oh, Martha, you experienced the glory.” And I said, “Really, wow!. Is that what it was?” I didn’t have a name. So she came back to me a little later, and she said that I told the Lord, “Why didn’t You give me the glory?” And He said, “Because you’re not good enough.” And I went, “Now that’s strange, because I know I’m not good. And I’m certainly…” I certainly didn’t know the glory. I didn’t even know what I was experiencing was the glory. So I puzzled over it, because I didn’t consider myself worthy of it or I didn’t understand why He gave it to me.
Yesterday I put some pieces together after 35 years, and I began to go back to see, because I was dealing with the veil. The veil comes off in 2nd Corinthians 3, which I’m dealing with in the devotional. When you turn in repentance to the Lord the veil comes off, and then you can see the glory. So I’m going into every kind of detail about that, and I realize the veil is something so simple. I took that scripture, “If you confess your sins,” and I think the Amplified says it wonderfully. “Walking and living in the light as He Himself is in the light, the blood of Jesus Christ, His Son, cleanses, removes from us all sin and guilt, keeps us cleansed from sin in all its forms and manifestations.” Now in those days I didn’t have an Amplified Bible. I didn’t know there was one. I just had the King James. But verse 9 says, “If we freely admit that we have sinned and confess our sins, He is faithful and just, true to His own nature and promise and will forgive our sins, dismiss our lawlessness and cleanse us continuously from all unrighteousness.” ALL!
(J) All is the word.
(M) “Everything not in conformity to His will and purpose, thought and action.” And I realized looking back over experience with people for 40 years, and I woke up with it this morning. There are two parts to repentance, not one. And the Lord said there are two parts. The first is confession; the next one is faith. And I believed like a child if I confess my sins He forgave me because of His nature, but He also cleansed me from the thing I confessed that moment. So I lived in a sort of… not innocence like never having sinned. I lived in a kind of place that was so secure and confident, and I felt His forgiveness. I felt the cleansing, and I didn’t realize that that’s not usual, because so many times because I was alone, and I learned these things, I assume everybody’s got it.
(M) And for me it’s like brushing your teeth. How boring it would be to describe that? I don’t even know what I’ve got. He taught me how to walk with Him, and I don’t really, still don’t know all I know that I need to share, but this is the huge one. Because I believed that, I confessed the sin freely. I understood repentance was the way to Him. And when I found out that you were cleansed when you confessed, I was delighted, but I believed it. That’s the deal; I believed it.
(J) So you’re saying the lady that wasn’t good enough was the fact that she wasn’t connecting?
(M) She was only not good enough because she wasn’t confessing her sins and believing in cleansing.
(J) See, that’s to me is amazing, because, you know, in my past, in my life, I have confessed, confessed, confessed, confessed, and I’ve seen things linger after..
(J) Yeah, they just, they’ve been there and they continue…
(M) Continue, yes.
(J) And they continue, and I’m going like wait a minute now! I’ve confessed those things. Why are they still an issue? And you’re opening up a huge door to show me what those…
(M) Right! See, if you confess your sin, and you still have guilt, it’s the failure to believe you’re cleansed. Jennifer said it yesterday when I shared with her. She said, “After you confess you go to the work, which is believing, not solving, not getting rid of the things, but believing that He does the cleansing in you.” So I lived in a kind of forgiven state. And as I look back on it, I’ve listed nine or ten experiences of the Lord that were really unique. He was free to break in on me, because there was nothing between us. And I’m learning about the glory and about being in the Father’s presence that you cannot go in with sin. And since it has been solved, there’s no reason for me not to be completely free of sin up to the current moment, and even what I don’t see as sin.
(J) I don’t know many people that don’t belabor their sins, their errors. Even the worst of people are usually saying, “Oh, I’m so sorry for that,” or, you know, they’re aware of something. They may not be in truth about what it is, but they’re aware of something. But the thing that you’re connecting with the lady is that she could’ve confessed hours and hours and hours and hours everyday, and still…
(M) Right! Still keep her sin, because she didn’t believe. We can believe we are forgiven, but it’s another thing to believe that we are cleansed.
(J) And that’s what held this woman out from the glory, and “you’re not good enough.” It’s not “good enough” that you acted right. It’s “good enough” that you believed Him.
(M) Right. Right. It wasn’t that… She was at that point… I had no books, no writings, no nothing. I was just a little Bible teacher, so her accomplishments for the Lord were far beyond mine. But you see the access to God lies in the Blood. The Blood of Jesus opened the door to the glory. The door is wide open, except to those who are veiled. And those who are veiled have not completed the repentance. They may have begun well. I’ve seen you repent gloriously. But see, I’m sorry, I didn’t know that I had a secret. But it’s… The cleansing, the cleansing makes you completely free. And if you remember it, which you usually don’t; if you remember your sin, it’s nothing. There’s no guilt. And in the Amplified, I didn’t even realize it, has the word continuously. He works… When you live a life of repentance in the light; the issue is being in the light. My heart is open to the light. I may not know my heart, but I’m walking in the light so far as I… My choice, my passion, my desire is to walk in the light as He is in the light. So that’s when you see the sin. If you walk in the light, you know your heart’s not right. “Oooweee, I’m bad here.” And it’s a jewel. It’s the difference between guilt and freedom.